4 Months Ahead of Schedule?

In an unusual turn of events I'm 4 months ahead of schedule for having my local sports team reach into my chest and ceremoniously rip my heart out.  Normally I have to wait all the way until May or June before the Suns take the annual honor.  Of course, they typically really build it up and make the most of it in a looooong, drawn out brutal playoff exit.  You know... so it's definitely worth the wait.

So it's with great pains that I announce that this year the Arizona Cardinals took care of the whole heart-stomping early in the year so I can get back to my life sooner than usual.  Heck... I may even skip the NBA playoffs altogether... you know, since that's what it looks like the Suns are going to do as well.

Oh well, great run by the Cards.  Hats of to 'em.  They pulled off the impossible for sure.  Fun to watch.  Probably shouldn't have even been there.  And, surprisingly, no less painful to witness their demise.  I was kind of hoping to ride my recent karmic tidal wave all the way to a super bowl title.  Nope.

On the bright side... this whole run by the Cards really caught me off guard.  I barely had time to get my arm warmed up for throwing the remote and my legs in shape for storming out of the room in disgust.  As a result, I was *not* in playoff form today and had to settle for a handful of screams and softly slinking away.  I still have a working TV *and* remote, though.

I must be losing my touch because Lauren and the kids didn't even feel the need to leave the house.  They actually invited *guests* over for the game.  What?  I'm not sure I can handle being emasculated so early in the year.  Next year I'll show up prepared and start working my unrealistic expectations into a frothy lather in early October.  Then I can really get into the NFL playoffs and make it hurt like it's supposed to.

Now let's all join hands and sing that familiar Arizona refrain... "There's always next year!"